Can’t a dude just love Best Coast?

I am a man, I love Best Coast.

Let’s start this off with some background: I’m a straight, white male (the privileged part is yet to be determined considering the $30,000 of college debt that have limited all my employment and living options). I’m 27, have a fair amount of experience under my belt and I consider myself pretty knowledgeable. I’m a typical dude but I realized growing up that a part of me identified with girls and women more than men. No Caitlyn Jenner, I don’t like acting or dressing like a girl, but I emotionally identify and align with the girls in pop culture that I was exposed to growing up more than the men.


Being a child of the late 80s (which as far as I’m concerned means I’m a child of the 90s), there was a ton of feminist movements going on. Think about it: when grunge stepped up, there was a HUGE feminist movement going on. Kurt Cobain considered himself a feminist, the Riot Grrrl music scene started to pick up, and stronger women were coming to the forefront of rock and popular music. Courtney Love, Kathleen Hannah, Carrie Brownstein, and Kim Deal were (for my generation) the leading women of rock and roll. As the 90s progressed, the R&B and hip-hop scenes had a lot of women in the spotlight, and pop began to do the same. I vividly remember growing up and listening to the Spice Girls and loving their music. It was catchy and fun…it was actually kind of progressive. Women in power, acting like dudes and not caring. If a guy could get a bunch of girls to scream and get wet over him, the Spice Girls acted like they were able to do the same and they DID.

Maybe it’s just a factor of growing up, something we learn as we mature, but I honestly have no knowledge of there ever being a time where women and men weren’t equal to me. It just seemed normal to me that if you have the experience and know-how, it doesn’t matter if you have a penis between your legs or a vagina. Maybe the 90s were a better time? Doubtful. If anything it’s just that we’ve brought these issues into the forefront more now because anyone can make the news with a few taps and swipes on their phone. Clearly these women, these Riot Grrrls and Pop Princesses, brought the attention forward at that time. So where are we today? Same place, different time. The exposure is stronger and more easily accessed, while strong women still have a presence in rock and pop with an even stronger movement in alternative music, starring such songstresses as Lana Del Ray and Annie Clark (of St. Vincent) and my unexpected favorite, Best Coast.


I was first exposed to Best Coast through Rocksmith, a video game that teaches you how to play a real guitar or bass (I highly recommend checking it out if you’re looking to learn how to play and can’t afford lessons, or are really self-conscious like myself). Bethany Cosentino is like my spirit animal-musician-person-thing and someone I deeply identify with. How could I as a dude, identify so well with this woman? Look no further than the first song on their first album, “Boyfriend” which laments, “I wish he was my boyfriend.” I was that dreamy-eyed youth that yearned for affection from a significant other. I didn’t commit to my first girlfriend until I was 22 who was my first kiss and more…if you get my drift. I was intimated by all the girls I knew and didn’t know how to approach women I was interested in without looking like a jackass. When I see Bethany, there’s a relateable quality to those vulnerable feelings. So what if a girl or a guy wants to be lovelorn and dreamy-eyed about someone? When you deal with anxiety, as most of us do, the dreamy desire and fear comes with the territory. Sonically the songs are upbeat and atmospheric, you feel like you’re cruising through Venice Beach, with the sun shining down and ocean breeze blowing through your hair. Feelin’ it.

Bands like Best Coast remind me that although I sometimes feel weird about identifying so closely with these women I was exposed to growing up, they helped define where my generation was going to go with equality. Rock on sexy women, kick out the jams and fight the power – I’m right here fighting the good fight with you.

– @tzarek1998

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The Litterboxx – Episode 16

Katy and I have spent the past year bitching about the funny behaviors men throw our way, so I it felt appropriate to finally have some men takeover and spit out the male perspective. This, will be a regular occurrence on the new Litterboxx. Sprinkle of V here, a little D there – we’re going equal opportunity :)


In this episode I bring my friend Matt to help with the co-host duties. A fellow east coast musician, filter-less jerk, Brooklyn resident and of course, merciless shit talker, Matt drops some dude bro knowledge on us. We talk about showing up to summer festivals at 3 PM and getting trashed off of beer all day, touring and making the best of your time on tour – going to strip clubs and dropping shrooms. On a more serious tip we discuss Monica Lewinsky overcoming stigma and the outrage of Rachel Doezal. Zeena also recounts her inability to fall out of ghettoland and pay for Spotify premium or give up Bud Lite faux margarita drinks.

Since we spend so much time bitching about dudes I asked, “do ya’ll talk about women?” Prob not in the same light. We talk drunk posts and retractions on Instagram, bad bands we rock to on the low (private sesh) and bad drunk behaviors. In addition to Matt I have on one of my favorite guests to date, our very own Magic Mike – A MALE ENTERTAINER. So many good stories about thirsty women, stripper fails, acting and of course, the misc jobs that lead up to his male entertainer domination. Listen in and get a few laughs.

Check us our on socials:

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Got that PMA: overcoming the subtle destruction of self sabotage

We’ve all seen the douchey memes that flood into our social streams like “you’re worth a million baby, don’t let anyone treat you like a thousand” and a myriad of variations of that ridic concept. Believe me, I’ve been guilty of a lot of unnecessary reposting and idea coddling. Sometimes you just need some bullshit to believe in, something to make you feel like in the entire scope of what is happening on earth makes sense. Maybe there is some kind of rhyme or reason. Escapism is built through tiny lies, minuscule fantasies that make life somewhat bearable and less insulting. It’s occurred to me some people are made for disappointment and can easily move forward. I used to view that as strength and resilience but now I realize it’s the ability to ignore the no and manifest the yes. Abandon the fantasy and you will be set free.

Recently I was chatting with a girlfriend about something and she was quick to point out my negative reaction towards the outcome of this specific thing. She immediately called me out and mentioned, “you always think the worst of it.”

Fuck, maybe I do?

When many impossible situations come your way on a consistent basis it almost becomes second nature to see things in a different light. Here’s some real heady shit: maybe our outcomes are determined by our applied actions. I’m Filipino, realism has been a core piece of my existence since I was a kid. We’re taught to dream big and aim high, but be realistic. I used to align myself as a realist to the max. “I’m not being a bitch by telling them the truth, I’m just being realistic and someone has to tell them the truth.” In actuality, who the fuck am I to rain on anyone’s parade? We all live our own realities and carefully see what we want to. So why not dream big? Why let the mundane disappointments of everyday life make you bitter and ruin your spirit?

The truth of the matter is as we age the naivety wears thin and with every negative validation, our soul gets compromised. Situations may not change but your approach is always the only variable that can shift. Whatever way you find that PMA, make it a priority. Most of the time the only thing standing between you and your goals is yourself (and sometimes the occasional asshole).

Don’t let the saboteur of your destiny be you.

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The Litterboxx – Episode 15

Time is a thief (or a cheap whore depending on your perspective) – if only there were more hours in a day, more days in a week. Every week is dramatically different these days and I’m taking you along for the wild, plot-twisting ride. Also, this is a momentous occasion for us because for the first time ever, we allow a dude into he clam party.

Katy and I discuss our adventure filled week of live music. You know when you’ve waited months, if not years, to see one of your favorite bands in their live glory? I got to see 2 of those in one solid week. Mustering up peak energy (obviously extracted from that babies blood of my early 20’s) I somehow cranked out 7 consecutive days of shows with the help of magic cookies. We discuss Patton and the sonic and visual gift that is Faith No More, as well as a crowd more engaged in their phones than watching the LIVE show. We’ve all been kinda guilty. We talk Jane’s Addiction, Poison The Well and throwing it back to 2003 at Skate and Surf (Note: I personally saw Razor Ramon throwing back the devil’s juice before he was ceremoniously booted off campus).


Here’s a VERY DIFFICULT QUESTION: Who are your top 3 lovers of all time? We discuss the ranking, requirements for placing and those who fall far short, aka the lazy, selfish lover. With summer coming (which means less clothing + inhibition) more possibilities are on the horizon. We talk about key goals this summer, keeping up the career hustle and crushing it, as well as analyzing what that college degree is really worth.

I invited my Revolver Podcast co-host and Filipino brother Chris Enriquez to be the first male perspective on the podcast and he doesn’t fail. We talk about the whimsical parts of being Filipino, our man Pacquiao’s loss and all the funny parts of our ethnic background. As a recently single man, we talk about punishers in dating life, bro chicks / basic bitches, some chicks being a boner killer and one of the grossest / craziest tour hookup stories I have ever heard (Hint: it involves vomit and cunnilingus, yikes).

You can also download this podcast via iTunes and Stitcher :)

Get on the BoxxTalk social flow:

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The Litterboxx – Episode 14

Working hard on the back end of The Litterboxx and just working hard in general, you know – the shit real life is made of. Exhaustion wins!

Our new logo, thanks to Neen (aka Danielle Vanacore) for this lil  gem!
Our new logo, thanks to Neen (aka Danielle Vanacore) for this lil gem!

On this episode we talk about trying to not get offended and baiting critics, especially those nameless, pussy internet trolls. We talk about contemplating career changes and remembering your inspirations because creativity don’t come cheap or often. Milk that bitch when she’s at play.

An old laughing stock has popped up in our lives and we talk about that predictable HO that pops up in your circle, who thinks no one sees his shit. Always need to warn a fellow boxx when they’re in danger of getting involved with a WHACK ass dude. We take a hard look at relationships and how people let themselves go, the double standard in dating, “wifey material,” mini-celibacy bouts to clear your mind and of course, Brooklyn’s award winning sexual prowess. You know where that leads…our PSA for taking your boxx of choice out to EAT. :)

Have you noticed Bruce Jenner’s transition? We discuss etiquette and the process he is going through. We dive into political equality for women and some predictions + concerns for the upcoming election. On the total flip-side Zeena talks about her first live UFC experience and flipping tickets, only in Newark. At least there were good things to look at. We also have on a very special guest and BAD ASS singer / songwriter Tiara Thomas – we talk about meeting dudes as a female musician, 420 + rolling choices, as well as going to college when you want a career in music. She rules, spirit animal all the way.

Check out more on Tiara:

If you haven’t already joined us socially, join the fucking party:

There is a misconception that women should remain the silent minority, holding our tongues in an effort to fit that traditional “lady” mold so forcibly shoved down our throats. We are not those ladies. The Litterboxx is a soiling ground for pop culture, music, sports, relationship + sex talk, hilarious encounters and anything in-between. Join Zeena and Katy in our quest to live life to the fullest, dominate minds and meet some hot babes in the process. Maybe fall in love, but let’s not get too crazy here.

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The Scorpio curse

[Note: This is the first time we’re letting a NON BOXX into the mix, enjoy. After all, we are dude lovin’ feminists :)]

Let me describe the most embarrassing moment of my life (to date):

In 5th grade, my elementary school had a special day called “Diversity Day” that was meant to show us what the world would be like if there was no diversity. Of course, I was one of very few people of color in my class/school/neighborhood/town so I knew diversity, motherfucker. Diversity Day ended up working like this: if one person did an action, the rest of the class of 30 or so kids had to follow. This meant everyone had to wear the same outfit. If someone had to go potty, 30 four-foot-tall children would have to walk to the bathroom, hands behind their backs, in a single file line while that one asshole who interrupted the entire class’ reading hour of Junie B. Jones or Goosebumps books used the bathroom. It was entirely counterproductive in teaching what diversity actually was. Everything about Diversity Day was awful, and to MY luck, my birthday that year happened to fall on this day. DIVERSITY DAY.

Elementary school isn’t like the rest of your life past high school – they actually give a shit about your birthday. That meant (as per Diversity Day official rules) everyone had to sing me “Happy Birthday.” Now normally, just your class would sing the song, but that day they had to adjust the rules to fit the occasion. That meant the entire 5th grade had to sing me “Happy Birthday” While I stood there in the center of the entire class. We’re talking over 120 children. Staring at me, not knowing what to do with my hands, or body, or face. Every second of it was excruciating and agonizing. I was fairly indifferent about birthdays then, but I really dreaded the attention. Over a decade later, I recovered for the most part. I still am pretty indifferent about my birthday, but these days I think I have even more of a deep-rooted reason as to why. Welcome to the mind of a Scorpio.


I have a friend who doesn’t talk much, but inside her iPhone notepad contains pages on pages of completely spot on notes she has taken about people she meets and how their personality and mannerisms align with their astrological sign. This would be borderline psychotic behavior if her notes weren’t 100% accurate, almost to a scary point. She doesn’t even have to ask what sign they are, she’s able to tell by the way that they act. This is what piqued my interest in astrology. In the past, when people would ask me what sign I am, they’d usually respond with an “uh-oh,” or nervous laughter when I told them I was a Scorpio. I never really made much of it. I later started to research what it really meant to be a Scorpio and it didn’t long to figure out why these people would respond in the manner that they did. Scorpios are fucked up humans, perhaps the worst of all the signs. We’re jealous and obsessive, but will get offended if people say that we are. We are secretive and not keen on openly displaying emotions, but will let these emotions just bottle up inside and slowly destroy us from the inside out. We’re manipulative, even when we don’t realize we are. We’re painfully indecisive. But hey, at least we’re…passionate?

In most recent relationship, (well, I don’t even know if it would be considered a relationship since I never actually called her my girlfriend because the Scorpio in me was too scared to commit) was a total shit-show. I was hesitant to open up and tell her personal things, because that’s what Scorpios do. The moments I felt like were “big steps in opening up” were apparently not all that momentous after all and she saw it as me not trusting her. I really liked her and this was a rare occurrence that intimidated me. She cared about me more than anyone has ever cared about me before and this was terrifying. Who the fuck would trust my dumb ass with the emotions of someone else? This was not good. It felt like the times I “expressed my liking for her” could be compared to shopping at Costco or a similar store where you buy things in bulk. You take one trip, or make one really big effort to express your feelings, in hopes that it will last for a while. Why buy 4 packs of toilet paper every week when you could buy a 64 pack that’ll last you indefinitely? Just make the times you express your feelings to her really worthwhile and you’ll be good, right?

In the back of the mind however, I knew that wasn’t how it worked. I realized that the Scorpio in me just wouldn’t get past that fear of expressing these emotions that I had. Despite all of this, I am not as bad of a person as that just made me sound. If my mother had waited 2 weeks to birth me, this piece of writing would not even exist – thanks Ma! (Kidding…kind of) This girl lived about 6 hours away and one night before she was going to come see me, I had a complete panic attack over the fact that someone would drive 6 hours to come see me. Why would anyone waste the gas money, time, and effort, just for me? No one has ever done that before. It was simply crazy. In the midst of my inner turmoil, I told her to not come, which eventually led to us breaking things off. You know the classic “it’s not you, it’s me” line? This couldn’t be more fitting, except I actually meant it. Obviously, I wouldn’t add insult and injury and actually feed that line to her, but if this whole situation could be boiled down to a single phrase, that would be it. I learned so much about my Scorpio self from that experience. She is still very special to me and I will hate any person she dates in the future (see my previously listed Scorpio traits). She was the first casualty of my astrological disease. God, I hope she never reads this.

For me, November 7 is more than just the day I was born – it’s a chronic reminder of the stars telling me that I’m fucked. Maybe that “Diversity Day” panic experience and early onset of indifference for my birthday were warnings that there was more to come. Nonetheless, those dealing with Scorpios, tread lightly. Better yet, run the other way.

– JC

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The Litterboxx – Episode 13

The Litterboxx podcast has been truckin’ along for the better half of 6+ months and we’re proud to announce we’ll be on Dash Radio starting mid-April. More clam chat, with bigger + better guests and we couldn’t be more excited :) Check out Dash Radio here + via the app:

For our 13th episode we break down the pressing issues of the last month. Due to an unfortunate accident, we lost an episode of the podcast in Zeena’s CD drive (damn you innovation) and had a LOT to catch up on. In true Litterboxx fashion we launch by discussing keeping on top of your sexual health and awareness, as well as what criteria makes for a sexy male suggestive photo. We also explore young dudes using Viagra / Cialis to keep their members at work, hey everyone needs a hand now and then RIGHT?

Zeena talks about her time at SXSW, looking at commercialized versus organic ways artists and brands are marketing. She also talks about meeting and hanging with her Broad City man crush, Hannibal Buress. We also dive into the perception versus reality of how hard we work even though we work “cool” jobs. There’s a ton of pressures, especially as a female in a male dominated industry. Isn’t it funny that women worry about a completely different set of issues in their career versus men? Stigma makes it hard to play ball on your terms and we take a focused look at those issues.


Have you used and abused Snapchat yet? The devil’s work. We explore its utility past salacious photos, consequences of screen shotting a snap and what fun thangs we’ve found on Snapchat. Social media makes for all the best awkward situations and we discuss having to put aside your pride in those situations, especially professionally. On the musical side we look at how artists are now promoting themselves and discuss the once revered mystery of Tool. We chat knowing your talents and growing into them, retiring piercings, changing hair color and all that grown up shit. Another week, another lesson!

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I Have Trust Issues Because of Tool

I remember being in Hot Topic in the 7th grade with my mom and begging her to buy me a shirt with this logo on it.  She wouldn't.
I remember being in Hot Topic in the 7th grade with my mom and begging her to buy me a shirt with this logo on it. She wouldn’t

If I were ever in some kind of weird hostage and/or deserted island situation where I had the option to only listen to one band for the rest of eternity, without question, that band would be Tool.  I could listen to the first track of Opiate all the way up to the last track of 10,000 Days over and over and over again and never get bored, tired, or sick of as much as a single note.  The only difficulty I would face in this choice is if I had to isolate one album as superior to the rest; I simply cannot pick one lone song, let alone one album, that stands above the rest.  The deep complexity that goes behind each and every one of Tool’s pieces is just so deeply masterful that I still feel the same intense spiritual reaction listening to the band now as I did in the 7th grade.

The problem with loving Tool so much is that I feel like I’m in a dishonest relationship that I can’t escape.  Here I am, impatiently awaiting new ANYTHING from the Tool camp, and instead, my hopes and expectations are just being met with lie after lie.  For the past several years, Tool’s all like “Oh, hay, guyz, our new album is coming along great” and then they’re all “lol just jk tho.”  I’m also still convinced that when the band issued a statement claiming that writing was being delayed because half the band was injured in a vespa accident was also just another bogus rumor.  Which, by the way, that was over two years ago, and there are still no new/real updates on this freakin’ album other than “we’re working on it.”  But like, are you really though?

Why can’t Tool just go straight Beyonce on us all and release a secret album in the night?  I mean, okay, obviously they’re nothing like Beyonce because they’re actual artists and not manufactured pop sensations, but still, I wouldn’t be mad if I woke up one morning and the internet was all “Surprise! Here’s a new Tool album.”  And in all fairness, this doesn’t seem far off from something they would do.  It’d be nice if that happened, like, tonight.  Oh, or on Record Store Day 2015!  That’s reasonable, right?  I’m spitting out great ideas here.  Someone should tell Maynard.

I mean, really though.
I mean, really though.

My overly dramatic whining aside, I do respect Tool as both musicians AND artists.  I realize that the kind of music they make isn’t something that can be achieved in a condensed period of time.  I would prefer Tool to take 10,000 days to make quality music than have them release some rushed, sub-par piece of shit.  Could you imagine if Tool put out a bad album?  What if they didn’t put out anymore music ever again?  I guess life will go on, but what kind of life would that really be?  I don’t even know how I would handle either of the aforementioned situations.  What would I even do?  Drugs, probably. Lots of drugs.

In the end, I guess it isn’t so bad that the Tool album hasn’t come together yet.  I just wish they’d stop fibbing though.  Is that so much to ask?


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Spring Is A Comin': Breaking the Cycle

It’s that time of year again. The post-NYE-resolution phase, where many of our fitness goals die after the 8 weeks of our “best” efforts at the gym. It’s that constant cycle- the roller-coaster of motivation that has us eating salads one minute, and snagging a fat pizza slice the next. There’s Something about the little victories and 5-pounds dropped in the first few weeks that has me allowing myself to slack now and then. The slack builds up, and suddenly I’m back to square one with my “new year, new me” journey.


For a lot of women out there, I’m sure you feel me. You’re tired of the up and downs, the constant battle to be in the physical shape you’ve always wanted to be. It’s not about looking a certain way or being ridiculously skinny but wanting to live life with the energy to do everything you want to do. You FINALLY want that goal achieved. I realize that I want that goal achieved and we both can, we break the cycle. This isn’t some bullshit article with magical tips and tricks to help you lose 20 pounds fast. This is some REAL advice for those wishing to break their old habits and start anew. I’ve been thinking about my own progress towards my health and fitness goals, and have found some ways to help those struggling like me.

It really is a lifestyle change, so stop kidding yourself with temporary plans to be ready for bikini season. If you want to be a fit, healthy individual there is no start and stop time for your journey. Don’t think for a second that once you hit that number on the scale that you can stop thinking about what you put in your mouth becuase It doesn’t work that way. A temporary change will only bring a temporary result. You need to create healthy habits that become a part of everyday life…like doing butt clenches on the subway or taking the stairs over the elevator. The little steps we can work into our daily lives will be the consistent victories that produce consistent results.

Don’t make a mountain out of a molehill. If we have to agree to this never ending quest called a “lifestyle change,” why make it harder on ourselves? Stop pretending that you can get that firm ass in 1 month. You can’t realistically jump head first binging kale chips, nixing soda, and promising that you’ll wake up every day at 6am to hit the gym before work because lets keep it real, you can’t keep that up. Start small, and work your way to long term success. Start by jogging 1 mile, at least once a week. Once you’ve done that a few times in a row, up it to at least 2 times a week. Don’t block your beloved Dr. Pepper from your life forever, maybe just see each other a couple times during the weekend – casual dating. You’ll be doomed from the start if you keep trying to bite off more than you can chew.

cheat meal

Treat Yo’self..just, never with food. Having a rewards system is important, but if the reward is counterproductive to the goal, WTF is the point? You want the reward to be something that will further motivate you to work harder. A good example for the stoners out there, would be to not smoke weed until you’ve completed your workout that day. This works – 1: You get a better high and 2: you will program your habits to get that workout done as soon as possible, in order to receive the reward sooner. GOOD TIMES FOR ALL.

Have your Bestie kick your ass. Misery loves company and gym company will help you get the most out of your workouts. Let’s face it, we don’t want to look like lazy slobs in front of our friends so we will push ourselves harder when we exercise with them. The more honest the friend, the better. I’m not saying your friends should judge your appearance but it’s amazing how hard you’ll work when your old friend from college mentions the extra 10 pounds you’ve added. Use the free motivation and give them a reason to tell you “damn, you look good.”

How does that make you “feel”? I’m not your therapist, but paying attention to how food effects our energy levels is a great strategy to help curb the junk food binges. You’ll notice it actually feels good to eat a salad, and how much more productive you can be when you think of food as fuel. It’s also helpful to note when food makes you feel shitty- because connecting junk food with the negative feelings can help destroy cravings for it in the future.

Light your fire. A little cliché, but it’s amazing what a little passion can do for your goals. Find something interesting about health and/or fitness. Find a sport you love. Make your health and fitness goals part of your interests and values and you will find it easier to be motivated. It seems simple but cultivating whatever genuinely interests you and fueling it towards your goals can do wonders for your progress.

STEP SIX, the most important!
DON’T BE A FUCKING QUITTER. Seriously, you’ll feel like a loser and you know it. The only way to truly give up on “the new you” is to stop. To quote my favorite lesbian fish, “just keep swimming” because even if you slow down, you’re still moving forward.

- @lindseyralls

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Litterboxx Podcast – Episode 12

A choice cut from Boston's Tinder population. You can't buy class this rich.
A choice cut from Boston’s Tinder population. You can’t buy class this rich.
TWELVE EPISODES. That’s a lot of shit talking my friend.

The winter is misery on the east coast and we’ve taken a beating over the last few months. Katy and I talk about treacherous weather conditions and recount both our getaways to Boston brotown and Nashville over the past month. In Boston, Zeena re-ignites her passion for authentic white meat and immediately abandons it. On a finer tip, we discuss the term “heavy petting,” some choice terms for lady parts and the eternal question, “did the forefathers manscape?”

We dive into our time on the High Times Instagram, body shaming and trolling in digital spaces. Isn’t it ironic that in a digital world that should be judgement free, so many are fueled by hatred? Jeez, smoke a fat one and STFU. We discuss wanting to feel special, Zeena joining a new gym and the most important news of the last few weeks – JNCO’s making a comeback. THE 90’s ARE LEGIT BACK.

We have a lady of the 90’s on as our guest, international singing powerhouse Janet Devlin. Check out her new album “Running With Scissors” + more here:

BoxxTalk on socials:

– @zeenakoda

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